How to survive a divorce with her husband – that psychologists advise?

How to survive a divorce with my husband? Get acquainted with the simplest but necessary truths from psychologists who will help you not fall into depression after a divorce with my husband

Husband’s husband – one of the most difficult situations in the life of a woman. Divorce is the loss of confidence in the closest person, the collapse of all plans, betrayal, a flurry of questions that will have to answer, and the most serious test for their willpie and self-confidence.

How to survive the divorce with the spouse? How to survive parting with your loved husband?

How to survive a divorce with her husband is advised psychologists?

Do not fall into a protracted black depression – this is perhaps the main task when divorced. Especially when the divorce is not a peaceful agreement of the people tired of each other, and «knife over heart», Little children and a shortage of air, because further – only emptiness. Of course, time is the best doctor, and the stress-experiences pass by themselves, after time.

See also: 8 main reasons why men go out of the family.

But this the process can, alas, not to delay for one year, Yes, and he takes too much strength. Therefore, it follows to deal with the problem, Do not accumulate inside, which will be demolished later by a snowy avalanche. What recommendations give psychologists to women in such situations?

• Consult a professional psychologist, If you can not cope not in a state. Stresses obtained by divorce can cause serious injury to the psyche. If no one day without soothing funds, the flow of tears does not dry, and nothing can distract you and interest – the assistance of a psychologist will not be superfluous.
• Put the target – Become happy, contrary to everything. Do not retreat, do not give in to the weaknesses, firmly follow your goal.
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  Reset the whole negative. Do not copy negative emotions, getting rid of them as arrivals (variants are many – from whipping dishes to tears in a girlfriend vest).

• Do not closure to yourself. Do not need to hide in the sink and hide from loved ones and friends devoting yourself to your own «Gorry». This is not a grief – this is a new milestone of life. It is close to people will help to overcome the difficult period as painlessly as possible. No need to shy your tears, experiences and words that someone can perceive as «nagging».
• Occupy your best practices. Do not leave free hours for self-fighting and pity for yourself. Remember the hobbies, about friends, about cinemas, etc. Do not sit at home in four walls – fill life with pleasant events.
• No matter how much you wanted to take revenge on the former spouse, turn his life into hell, make it suffer (even involuntarily) – Do not go to the gossip and revenge. The situation you do not fix this, but your reputation can suffer significantly. Not to mention that the stressful state itself is only aggravated by such actions. Release offense.
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  Do not try to replace the emptiness inside the urgent search for new relationships. They will not help forget the spouse. Still too alive in your consciousness relationship with a former husband, and a new partner is doomed to the fact that you will constantly compare him with my spouse. Yes, and relationships built on the basis «called former», will never be durable. And even short intrigues will not bring you soothery. Just give yourself time to cool down, and mentally stabilized. Dive with your head to new relationships can only when the past no longer turns you soul inside out and you are really free for new love.

• Time, of course heals. But, given the laws of our memory, from time to time you will still return to the divorce and moments of living together with the spouse. The past can remind a suddenly encountered shared familiar, melody and a postcard in a box on the antlesol. The pain that you did not let go immediately may then chase all life. therefore Home Your task is to forgive. And not only for divorce, but for everything you were unhappy. Remember only good moments and mentally tell me thanks for what they had. With these good thoughts and release your resentment and former husband.
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  Leave the head to work and children – not the best way out. It is clear that you need to distract from thoughts, but this option entails your chronic fatigue and neurotic disorders. Yes, and children need a healthy cheerful mom, and not a pale ghost with shaking with handicrafts. therefore Switch to what you really wanted, but was not available in family life. Make a list of what you want. And methodically carry out the intended. Realize that now you can afford everything.

• Do not conju yourself and do not look for the cause of the collapse of the family boat in itself. First, it does not make sense. Because the divorce has already happened, and you need to move on. Secondly, two are always to blame. Thirdly, you are not oracle, and could not provide all. Try to take parting, as the next first biography fact, and nothing more.
• Do not let relatives, and even more so – to unauthorized persons criticize you. They do not have the right to blame you in the breaking of relations, in the fact that the children stayed without a father, or that you were inattentive wife. Scandaling, of course, do not. As well as justify. Come in these situations with the dignity and tranquility of an elephant after bathing – «The topic is closed. I ask to free the room», «I do not know about whom you say», «I think that my relationship with your husband relate only to us two». Also ignore and unfriendly people who, at any opportunity, seek to bite you, informing about the events of life of an alien person.
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  Do not put a cross on yourself. Who said that a woman is divorced or a woman with children can not find happiness? According to statistics, it is them in this matter and is accompanied by luck more often than others. Categorically do not let yourself «descend» to the disheveled aunt in the established bathrobe with circles under the eyes. Make a makeup and hairstyles, watch your appearance, buy new clothes, smile yourself! The pillow, of course, will erase your tears, but life continues – and bury yourself early. Stay for children and relatives An example of a self-sufficient volitional woman who knows the price.

• Hide from the eye one thing all you can remind about the past. Souvenirs, gifts, photos, etc. You do not need to throw out, just remove. Or on the mezzanine, or at all, take away the cottage and fold in the attic. Someday when the pain appears, and it will take enough time, you will want to revise them.
• Found out that the former husband is going to marry again? Saw it on the street with a new passion? Smile and mentally wish him happiness, How to wish a friend. Rearing resentment, you are freed from those shacks that pull you on the bottom. Be able to forgive – the most complex science, but it is she forms that creative energy that determines our further happy life.
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  You have common children? In no case do not configure your crumbs against the Father. Should not be criticized in their presence and blame former husband. For children, divorce is an even more severe test than for you. Your task is to give them to feel that, despite the divorce, dad and mom still love them, and nothing can interfere with it.

Is there any life after a divorce? Definitely – is! Just accept her as it is, and Move on. Look for advantages and exclude flaws. Realize your true needs and, Putting a goal, move to it. Survive the divorce is difficult. But your future and the present depends only on you!