How to build the relationship of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law – tips of the psychologist

How to build the right relationship with mother-in-law? Read the advice of a psychologist about the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Learn how to behave with mother-in-law, find a common language with mother-in-law and keep peace in relationships

Problems and lack of mutual understanding in the relationship of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law – the situation is more than common. Of course, universal recipes «Friendship» There is no way – in each situation needed their own methods.

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But there are general recommendations that can reduce the degree of voltage and preserve the world between the eternal rivals. What psychologists advise?

• The best recipe for ideal relations with mother-in-law – Separate accommodation. And, the farther – the more rosy, these relationships will be. Living together with parents, and daughter-in-law and her husband will constantly feel the pressure of mother-in-law, which, of course, will not benefit the relationship of a young family.
• Whatever mother-in-law, if there is no possibility to distance them, then It must be taken with all its qualities and parties. And realize that mother-in-law is not your rival. That is, do not try her «Check out» and admit (at least externally) her «primacy».
• Association with anything against the mother-in-law (with her husband, with his father.) Initially meaningless. In addition to breaking relations in the end, it does not succeed.
• If you decide to conversation with mother-in-law «heart-to-heart», then SBashed focusing on her opinion and desires, Do not allow aggressive tone and try to find a way out of the problem situation.
• Living with mother-in-law, remember that Kitchen is only its territory. Therefore, the master should be changed in the kitchen at their discretion. But maintain order, clean up – it is important. And, of course, the mother-in-law will be nice if you ask her advice or a recipe for any dish.
  
• No matter how you wanted to complain about my mother-in-law – it is impossible to do this. Even in a joke. At a minimum, you will lose my respect for mother-in-law.
• In the situation of co-stay at once speak the rules of your small family with mother-in-law. That is, for example, not to enter into your room, do not take things, etc. By itself, to do it exclusively in a friendly tone.
• If in relations with mother-in-law you are looking for equality, then Do not try to treat her as daughter to your mother. On the one hand, it’s good when mother-in-law loves his daughter as daughter. On the other hand, she will be controlled by her child. Choose you.
• Mother-in-law does not want to maintain normal relationships? Scandal is inevitable? And you, of course, are to blame for all possible sins? Do not react. Do not respond in the same tone, Do not pue oils into the fire. The scandal flared by itself.
  
• Do not forget that mother-in-law is also a woman. And what woman does not make up and gifts? No need to buy her respect for expensive things, but Small attention signs can significantly improve your relationship.
• Initially, mark the borders in the relationship with mother-in-law. It should immediately understand what areas you do not fail its intervention. Otherwise, be patient and wise. Unreasonably grieves, swears? Think about something pleasant and miss her words by ears.
• Find a way to do without the help of mother-in-law, even when it is just necessary. This also applies to the supervision of children, and monetary assistance, and household situations. Rare mother-in-law will be in these issues «Native Mother». As a rule, you will be replied in the fact that she is engaged in your children, you live on her money, and in the house without her, at all the cockroaches with snakes would have been crawling.
  
• Any conflict emerging with mother-in-law decide together with her husband. Do not rush to the ambrusura alone. And even more so – do not do it in the absence of a husband. Then he was reported on the conflict, taking into account the opinion of the mother-in-law, and you are in this «Report» You will not be exhibited in the best light. If the husband persistently refuses «put in these troubles», this is a reason for a serious conversation with him, and not with mother-in-law. Read: Who next to you is a real man or Mamienkin Son? It is clear that nobody wants to choose in the conflict to the conflict, but if your little family is the road, he will do everything to eliminate these conflicts. For example, talk to my mother or find an option for a separate stay.