A young family lives with parents – how not to spoil relationships with a joint stay?
How to live with my wife’s parents or husband, and at the same time save good relationships? Find out on Lady-Magazine.COM, what are the pros and cons, how to communicate correctly, if a young family lives together with parents
Each cell of society – a young family – dreams about his own square meters to live separately from relatives, to keep up with the owner and hostess in his own home.
But sometimes circumstances are folded in such a way that Newlyweds have to live with parents, And with each family member you need to make efforts to keep the warm spiritual atmosphere in the house.
How to achieve maximum comfort in the current situation – read below.
Young family lives with parents – pros and cons of coaching with parents
- If a young family does not have means to buy or rent a housing, a joint accommodation with parents will help Sweet enough money For the purchase of your living space. See also: As a young family get a loan for the purchase of housing?
- Positive family experience of the older generation, Built on trust, mutual respect and understanding, will help the young couple of building relationships on the same principles.
- When two families live under one roof, Domestic issues to solve much easier. For example, while the daughter-in-law at work, mother-in-law can cook dinner for the whole family, and after dinner, the daughter-in-law will easily wash the dishes. Or son-in-law on the weekend will help dig test potatoes at the cottage, which is intended for the whole family.
- Sincere conversations between parents and children help Strengthen the relationship between generations. By the way, from such conversations you can learn a lot about your second half, which will help to reveal your chosen one from all sides.
All these moments can be attributed to the pros. But, as you know, each medal has two sides. So in the joint stay of a young family with parents negative sides:
- After the wedding at the initial stage of joint stay, the young comes Stripping and addiction to each other. This process is very complicated for both spouses. This is also added to the need to form friendship with parents. Not every young family can withstand such a double load.
- Arising Conflicts with parents on the household level (the daughter-in-law did not put a plate there, the son-in-law refused to go to fishing test and t.D.) Do not help strengthen a young family, and vice versa, add quarrels in relationship between young spouses. See also: As a daughter-in-law save good relations with mother-in-law?
- Parents are very hard to keep in order not to give advice, impose your opinion a young family. They just need to recommend how to educate children, to solve economic issues and spend the family budget. Psychologists argue that it is for this reason that young families are most often disintegrated.
- By the way, if one of the spouses wants to live with his parents, motivating it «to not offend them» – This is a disturbing signal that talks about The inability of the partner to live independently, and also personally make decisions and bear responsibility for them. It is dependent on parents, and you, if you make a situation, you will have to live by their rules. See also: Your man – Mamenkin Son?
Live with parents husband or wife: the most frequent causes of conflicts between the young family and parents
The monologue is remembered from one famous film: «I am very respectful of your parents. But, thank God, I am not an orphan. Why should I constantly adapt to your parents? If I do something, it is considered under the microscope. This is a tension!»
Each family has its own rules and traditions. That spouse who will live with other people’s parents will always feel «not in its plate».
- Most often conflicts flashed on household soil, For example: the daughter-in-law is splashing in the bathroom or not as mother-in-law, cooked borsch. And son-in-law, instead of going to the market, how it usually does his father-in-law, sleep until 10 am. Permanent morals of parents cause negative emotions, which are then poured either on parents or each other.
- Another frequent cause of conflicts is the topic of raising children. Grandparents who are accustomed to raising a child in the old manner, impose this system and young parents who may wanted to raise their baby in modern methods.
- Sooner or later, financial claims arise. Parents who fully pay utility services buy household appliances to their home (washing machine, microwave, stove) and other items used by all, in the end, it will be bored, the reproaches and misunderstandings will begin.
How to live with parents and keep wonderful relationships – ways out of difficult situations
If a young family lives with parents, she must remember that The owners of the living space, where they live are parents, and with their opinion will have to be considered.
- To share life for everyone as comfortable as possible (as far as possible), everyone needs to communicate be polite, not to raise the voice, try to understand the interlocutor.
- Parents need to try to be patient, Do not impose your opinion if you give advice – in a delicate form.
- Everyone must help each other in a difficult minute, maintain, encourage if a young family or parents have problems.
- Preferably, more Before living with parents to conduct clear boundariesU: Discuss questions about the payment of utilities, parenting and t.D.
Live with his parents of his wife or husband can even be very comfortable, calm and convenient, If there is no too close connection between parents and their children. And if mommy still does not decide to give his child, some «Nappy» or «Bezless daughter-in-law», That is better make a maximum effort to quickly live separately.