How to survive the divorce

What to do if the husband left the family how to live on and relieve life to his children? Our today’s conversation

How was the right to be a classic, arguing that every unfortunate family is unhappy in their own way. Basic options for family misfortunes can be tailored to the fingers of the loser milling. Your story is simple, banal and old as the world – husband left family.

Yes, the story is banal, but you are not easier from this. And in front of you, two questions get up – the most favorite questions of the Russian intelligentsia: who is to blame and what to do? The first question will notice immediately.

Analyze the situation and make the appropriate conclusions, in case the following husband also wants to leave the family – you will still have full time. Your task number one is to get out of a complex life period with minimal loss.

So, the question «who’s guilty?» put it on far then. The main question is on the agenda today ..

What to do?

Let’s start with what I have long wanted, but I could not afford to afford a married lady in the status of married – dedicate a couple of days to myself. If you think that I will now begin to ride your soul, painting the charms of shopping, restaurants, SPA salons, massage and everything else, then mistaken.

Of course, we live in the real world, and not on the pages of the magazine Cosmopolitan, and a shaky financial situation with the departure of the main miner is unlikely to be better. Most likely, you will have to include a rigid financial savings mode for a while.

But that’s what to afford it is quite possible:

• Sleep over. That’s true, you remember when the last time slept as much as we wanted? If, besides, you are a convinced owl, and my husband who left you was a lark, I can assume that you have been trying to have a truly long time ago;
• Down with kitchen slavery! «Burn around» For the next weekend with finished products, cooking and semi-finished products, and come into the kitchen only heat the ready and brew tea. By the way, about tea …;
• Now you can throw away the package of pathetic evergreen Chinese tea, and most importantly, erase from the memory of the strict rules for which this tea should be brewed. You can not bother drinking simple «Lipton» In one-time bags, not listening every time a bore lecture on how you insult all the bright, which eats in the world, drinking the millennial tradition of tea;
• It turns out that the world will not stop rotating if daily cleaning will become weekly. And even if you do not wash the unfortunate plate immediately after the meal, the earth will not get on the heavenly axis;
• Finally, you are delivered from the weekly voluntary-compulsory look at the mother-in-law, as well as from her sudden visits, at the most inopportune moment.

Well, and so on in the same spirit that you can still do, I think. Now what to do in no case can. In no case can not be launched, turn into noise. From the guidance of a complete marathet, now, of course, can be refrained, but neglected with cosmetic procedures, allowing to preserve the body tone, face and skin, in no case can.

Husband left – children stayed

As you already, I hope, understood, keeping husband – not the worst thing that can happen in life. For you, but much sharper the situation is experiencing children. What to do in such a situation what to do in order to care for the father as little as possible affected the remaining children.

Let’s just say – the husband can go to another family, But the father of his children he will never stop. Husband left you, but not father from children. In no case do not configure children against the Father. No matter how hard you were, your children in any case are even harder, so why exacerbate their suffering?

Also should not prevent Father meetings with children, not in your power to replace male education, especially for boys.

How to facilitate the condition of children when divorced?

• Immediately openly explain to children a new position of things. It is better than the annoying expectation of the Pope, which will not come;
• Explain to the kids that, although they will see the second parent now not every day, they have dad, and he will take part in their upbringing. They are not orphans and not «Wet trap»;
• Try to make the usual order of things changed for children as little as possible;
• At the same time, in no case, do not let children sit on their neck, the departure of the Pope does not mean the end of the discipline in the house;
• Do not speak about the second parent negatively in the presence of children and do not allow others to do;
• Create in the mind of children the image of invisibly present second parent. Constantly talk about, «What would the dad say» or «Dad would not approve this». Very many children, such as sailors or watch workers, and so see the Father «alive» Not so often, therefore the positive image of the parent is a serious education factor.

Of course, the presence of both parents is extremely important for a child, and ideally that parents live together. But at the same time, it should be remembered that the desire to keep the family at any cost «For children» – Serious error.

Whatever the children are hard now, when they grow up, they will understand that it is better to calm and adequate parents living separately than the ever-embittered hated people who are serving life under one roof. Speculating the same children in front of her husband who is going to leave the family, generally borders with meanness.

Husband gone, life continues

The main thing is to remember that life is not finished, you need to continue to live and move forward. But can you move forward, constantly looking back? Many women, surviving a break, make a big mistake, tormenting themselves endless «why?».

You just need to take a simple fact that everything in the world has birth, growing, decay and end. And feelings – no exception. Your relationship was outlined, and approached our logical conclusion. It is better to just recognize this fact, and not try to galvanize the corpse of your feelings.

Similarly, there is no point in which time, scroll the chronicle of the last days in the head, trying to catch a hook that would allow you to keep your loved one.

If the husband decided to do anything, for example, to leave the family – He will do it, otherwise it would simply be a man whom you were loved in your time. Do not look around, live in real and not shown tears look into the future.