What is rudeness and how to deal with him

What is rudeness and his difference from rudeness. Why the ham is attacking you. Situation with rudeness – power struggle. How to answer rudeness colleague or boss. Re-educate husband-ham

Rudeness is the type of incorrect behavior, which is difficult to give a characteristic, and nevertheless, we all know what it is. Faced with rudeness, we suffer not only from the resentment, but also from the inability to resist. Are there any definite ways to answer rudeness?

How to understand what you rude?

Faced with Ham at work, on the street, in a circle of friends and even in the family, the first question will be «I really chamid or a person just a difficult day?». The normal feeling in such a situation is confusion, because the attack of Hama is always unexpected and felt as undeserved and inadequate. That is why it is often not possible to quickly react, since the first few minutes go to the evaluation of the offender actions.

There is an opinion that it is more expensive to enter into a dispute with Hum’s dispute, in contrast to the reaction to rudeness, arrogance and insolence. As the writer Sergey Dovlatov, rudeness – it is arrogance, and incoming, and rudeness together, multiplied by impunity together.

It is also true that the most difficult part of the task, how to respond to rudeness, is to determine whether you can put in place of such a person, teach, or not.

Rudeness is cut into memory for a long time because it contains some particularly offensive words, but because it puts you into a humiliating position, from which, as it seems to be offended, you do not get out. Strictly speaking, this is his goal – to put you in the puddle, preferably with witnesses. 

Hama think they are fighting for power

To understand the basis of this behavior, you need to dig deeper. After all, Hama and Khameki are not just nothing to do to do those who are surrounding what the scandalists are engaged in, unbalanced, boils and other. The level of rudeness is the level of claims from the sphere who is the main.

In society, unfortunately, the method of the hierarchy flourishes, in which you do not like to squeeze into some Casta – or those who can stand up for themselves, or unrequited weaklikov. The meanness is that people are rude only to those who knowously can not defend, for example, you do not have time to answer, forced to restrain, because you are busy, because you are watching children, bosses or you are too well brought up and in status do not go down to abuse and revenge.

And here he is a sweet moment for Hama – you can beat unpunished. In fact, this is a psychology of a slave, a weak oppressed member of society, for a moment that received power to recoup at least someone. The most significant example of such a feeling of impunity is rudeness on the roads, because everyone is covered in his car and thinks that he will not catch up. So to speak, threw a bomb – and left.

So the first thing you can defend is a clear understanding of the goal of Hama and his level of personality development. As soon as you see that this person attacks you, it is immediately washed with it to determine it in the category of revised slaves who have lost the right to benevolent communication with you on equal. And at this moment, decide how it will be right – toggle in response, silent, leave or pretend that you do not understand Russian. 

We choose tactics about the situation

First discuss how to behave with people with whom long-term relationships are not associated – passerby, man in line, driver on the road, random acquaintance at a party.

If you are rudely nahamili, humiliated on some topic (due to the fact that you are a woman, in appearance, for some kind of statement), then you have a choice: 

• Do not stay in debt, comment – then we learn how to rude beautifully in response;
• Skip by, ignore, only for this you need steel nerves. 

Note, the last option is not for wounded. You know yourself well enough to determine whether you will remember the rude from the bus, whether you will scroll the guy’s guy in my head from a party who behaved like a troll from the Internet, will you for a long time you deteriorate and lose your confidence , in no way punishing Hama.

If this is about you, it is better to learn by heart the phrases and the techniques of the so-called psychological aikido. Witty honorable Hama, you calm down and quickly forget the incident.

Another thing, if constant grazing from her husband or employee arose against you. Well, if you have a fast reaction and, as they say, needles under the tongue. Rudeness will not be chronic, if it stop from the first time, also putting an idiot of the attacker in the eyes of other people.

But it is ideally, and in life we ​​forgive and tolerate, especially when we do not want to spoil relations, convince yourself that the offender just got a hard day, he got up not standing legs and so on. And for your humanity and loyalty, we usually receive not a reward, but the situation when Ham sits on the neck and hits heels in the eyes. What to do if Ham broke up? 

Khamoviti Head

The boss with the Khamsk gash is the problem that needs to be solved, and urgently. As you already understood, he will not stop until they destroy the sense of self-esteem and dignity in you, and does not bend the most disgusting methods.

How to confront rudeness at work? If we are talking about a colleague, you can call a person to talk aunt-a-tete and calmly, but it is extremely clear that specifically it hurts you, thoroughly threaten that if he or she fails, you will raise the question at the subordination level, and it ( her) will learn the bosses.

But if you have to be aspired by the head, with an eye on the eye it is better not to communicate with him. Conflict in the presence of employees: He is Hamit, and you demonstrate calm and concentration at work. Ask how his attacks concern your duties, did he finish with stinging remarks and can you start work.

You can still resent how right it goes to personality, you actually work here and I have come home to him. All this is told a calm tone, so that you could not blame in disrespect.

With the chief, you were originally not on equal in the chef, so transfer the conflict to the professional sphere: if he imagined that he could handle the mood with impunity, take a job in working order – refuse overtime tasks, do not take working home, leave the workplace with an accuracy of the minute , Turn off enthusiasm. Tie his attacks with the results of your work, let him see that his rudeness would be expensive to him. 

How to teach for the rudeness of her husband

That’s where I need iron self-discipline. Family War Game – Way Nowhere. Children’s warring parents suffer and sick, the pressure rises in both mother-in-law and mother-in-law, and the marriage itself becomes over the negative that the final may be sad.

What else will not help fix the khamovitoy husband? For example, a frank conversation in the kitchen with a resentment and appeal to conscience. Hama rely on their impunity, remember? They have no conscience! Family Council in 50% of cases will end with your tears, in the rest – the wall of misunderstanding and even attempted a fierce spouse to knock off the sleep.

You can refuse her husband in sex, as most women think. That’s really not punishment! A cold war begins with him, not a re-education, and a man, if he really gripe on your eyes and becomes a scoundrel, consistencies as your most weak attempt to resist: they say, and that’s all you can?

So how will it be right? The wise decision you can take is simple for understanding, but complex performed. Need to be removed from the man, but at the same time perfectly fulfill their duties in relation to it.

We specify:

• We greet, answer questions on the merits, we are preparing food, we wash, we clean, we carry out the role of the hostess, if the guest came to him, we sleep in one bed;
• Do not talk about everyday trifles, hide what we think, I do not understand how he has things, do not care, whether he likes, do not caress, do not kiss, do not care, do not support at a party;
• Higher aerobatics – having sex without feelings (for real bitch). 

Caught the principle? Perform the role of spouse formally. Asked what is the matter, answer: «Cease to heat – there will be a family warmth, but for now – so!». Men do not endure coldness, even the most hotted Ham will break. Or rather, learns the mind and will not take revenge.

Learn to beautifully leave conflict, and when necessary – re-educate loved ones, and the problem of rudeness will not disturb you!