12 basic principles of raising children without punishment – how to educate, not punishing the child?

How to educate children without punishment and is it possible? Read on Lady-Magazine.COM 12 principles of upbringing without punishment for harmony in relations with children. Education without whining, punishments and screams possible!

Many parents doubt the correctness of their education. The main doubt, of course, always concerns the use of punishments. The conversation is not at all about the belt and strap, but about punishments in general – such as an angle, deprivation of a computer or personal money.

How punishment works?

We are confident that we know what is better for our child. This point of view is maintained all life. But, solving for the kid, we give his independence, turning a person in the mattress.

Need to Be sure to listen to the wishes of the child!

Example. Mom dressed her daughter in a bright, beautiful dress, and she wanted to play in the sandbox. Mom forbids – After all, the dress is swinging. But my daughter’s clothes are not important, it is important to her. The girl is still in what a walk, most importantly – have fun. Conclusion: Mom turned a walk to torture for both. And in the end, the daughter will be punished for being bored and want to play.

What is punishment?

This is – Additional motivator, which limits the child in some action. But the child must be afraid not punishment, but the natural consequences of his actions. Punishing, we teach it to avoid reprisals, lie, remune. Natural consequences are inevitable. It is better to focus on them. Did not remove toys – did not find a favorite soldier. Here it is punishment!

Make a child for disobedience?  Is it possible to do without punishment?

Parent who voluntarily chosen this path, faces many difficulties. But it is worth understanding that the absence of punishments is not at all permissiveness. This method of education does not deprive the person of the rules and norms of behavior, and does not mean at all that if the Karapuz will hit the neighbor on the sandbox, then it will be plugged on the head for it.

Basic principles of raising children without punishment

• Patience. Parents who dare to raise without punishment choose a complex and shady way. It will be a lot of problems, but when complying with all conditions, they will grow a happy and self-sufficient person.
• Children need to love not for what they give us (sense of confidence, usefulness and pride), but to love just like that. Of course, it is easier to punish how to deal with bad behavior. But this is manifested by the egoism of parents. They make it easier for themselves, infrainmenting their child – a little personality.
• Take your child as it is, with all problems, troubles and whims. He must feel that he loves and appreciate him.
• Need to pay enough attention to. After all, it is his deficit causes disobedience.
• Recognize the identity of the child. From the smallest years, when Karapuz still can not speak, he already chooses his clothes, toy. He has his feelings and suffering. You can not be neglected. After all, it ruins individuality.
• Parenting a personal example. If you prohibit the child to lie – do not do and do not embellish yourself. Observe the rules for the whole family. Congenital child instinct imitate adults acts on the subconscious level. Try and you will understand that it is so.
• The more pressure, the more resistance. If you constantly cut – remove toys, do it, do it, do not take, do not break, do not touch, then you can create such a tense atmosphere that the child wants to escape from it. What he will try to do in whims, protests and hysterics.
• Punishment confirm that every power there is still much power. Kid will grow up and your power and financial authority will disappear. Then the understanding will come that the punishment is a mistake of education, but it will be too late.
• Sequence – assistant in compliance with the rules. They said that do not give candy to dinner – do not let. If today it is impossible, and tomorrow you can, then you can always.
• Keep the need for encourage. Children are faster forgotten about the punishment, which threatens in case of pranks, but remember the presents for diligent behavior.
• Parent must constantly develop, learn, In order for an adheating baby to not put it in a deadlock with complex questions.
• Not going to provocate – hysterics, reproaches, rudeness. Be indifferent to such emotional explosions.

See also: How to educate a child manipulator – tips for parents.

It is known that children who grow without punishment are less aggressive. After all, rudeness is a revenge for pain. Punishment give rise to bitter offense, which is shuffling everything, including common sense.

That is, this negative child has nowhere to do, and he burns from the inside. Therefore, children often break off on younger brothers, sisters and pets.

See also: What to do parents during a quarrel of children – how to behave correctly?

What you need to know parents about raising children without punishment – how to learn this art?

• Stubbornness and whims – a way of self-expression of a child, when he lacks freedom. Often they arise in crisis periods of life – 3 years crisis, transitional period. Every year add a child freedom and personal space, not duties. After all, freedom is decision making.
• To allow natural consequences – True punishment.
• Feel moving together. For example, a child took someone else’s thing. Need to explain that the owner of things will be upset if it does not find it in place. After all, she is so expensive. Need to return her to the owner!
• Adult must ask the child’s interest in the right behavior, and not focus on unwanted actions. T.E. The parent does not warn if you touch the flower, blow. And says, sit, play with a doll while I do not come.
• And what about the little children? They do not understand the wrongness of their actions, and it is almost impossible to explain it. Then you just need physically remove the baby from the dangerous situation and SOcreate a safe environment for it. If climbs to the courtyard, then you need to carry a crumb into another courtyard and distract to the toy.
• Talk about. Explain what is good and what is bad. Model situations on dolls and solve problems in the game.
• Do not impose prohibitions for the necessary actions. The child can not sit quietly on a chair about 40 minutes in line. Children are useful to run, play, jump and sports. That they are children, and the desire to have a convenient child is the requirement of parental egoism.

Education without punishment does not lead to egoism. After all, egoers are adult children who are trying to catch up with adult condition.

Education without punishments – big and hard work. Mainly, this is work on yourself – after all, whatever we do, children will still like us.

And how do you feel about the punishment of children? Is it possible to raise without punishment? Share your experience in the comments below!