Reasons for children’s greed – what to do parents if the child is greedy

What to do if the child is greedy? The main reasons for children’s greed – think if your wines are in this. What if the child is greedy, how to deal with the greed of the child – on Lady-Magazine.Com

Responsibility for the upbringing of the kid always lies on parents. They are brought up in a small little man, both positive aspects of character, and directly opposite. The parent is, a kind of, the artist – what will draw, then the world will see. Therefore, the causes of children’s greed should be sought, first of all, in educational methods of dad and mom.

How children’s greed grow – the childhood of greed in the child at different stages of age

Unwillingness to share his toys, things and even a meal notice many parents from their kids. Often, moms have to be blushing for their crumbs on a visit or on the playground, when little Jadda shouts to peers «I’m not giving it!» and hides behind the back of the scoops or machine. Or hides at home your brother’s toys (sisters), categorically not wanting to share things even «briefly, just play». What reasons?

• 1.5-3 years. In this age Concept «His / alien» The kid has not yet formed. Because now the crumb is owned by the whole world foreseeable.
• By 2 years, the kid already consciously utters the word «my!» and ceases to talk about himself, loved, in the 3rd face. This means that the first serious stage of the psychological development of the child began. Now he forms an idea of ​​himself itself and begins to install boundaries separating «naught» and «Alien». Word «my» From the child is the designation of his personal space, which includes everything expensive croche. This is the natural process of forming the psyche and the appearance of the concept «Alien». Accordingly, I scold kid at this age for greed.
• By 3 years, the kid acquires the ability to speak «No». In the absence of such ability, the kid will be hard «balance» at an older age. Inability to say «No» leads to indulgence of whims of the surrounding people to the detriment of itself, to debit money, which are then months (or the years), ask to return back, and to the other consequences. Learn to talk «No» – important. But also IMPORTANT AND TAKE A CHILD to clearly track the edges – where exactly the natural reaction to the actions of others turns into greed.
• After 3 years, the new stage of socialization begins. Communication comes to the fore. Toys and personal belongings are becoming tools that binds this communication. Awareness comes to the baby that it is to share people to share – it means to adjust them against themselves.
• At the age of 5-7 years, greed is the inner disharmony of the baby, testifying to internal problems. Parents follow «shove deeper» and figure out, first of all, in their methods of upbringing.

The main reasons for greed in children: So why a child is?

To «cure» greed, You need to understand – where it appeared. Experts allocate several main reasons:

• The child lacks parental love, attention, heat. Most often, the little lady grows in families where the manifestation of love is another gift from too busy parents. Baby, longing to attention mom with dad, perceives their gifts as especially valuable, and in this case greed becomes natural (but wrong!) Consequently situations.
• Jealousy to brothers (sisters). Most often – to younger. If the brother (sister) gets more attention and parental caress, then the child automatically expresses its resentment by the manifestations of greed and aggressiveness in relation to the brother (sister).

• Excess attention and parental love. Of course, the parental love does not happen much, but allowing the child everything (from the diaper), and satisfying each of his whim, the mother in the end brings up a little tyrant. And even if it is sharply stopped to indulge his whims – this will not change the situation. The child just does not understand – why did everything be used before, and now – nothing?
• Shyness, indecision. The only friends of custodized in the communication of the baby is his toys. With them the child feels safe. Therefore, and share the baby, of course, does not want.
• Excessive thrift. This is the very case when the kid is so worried about the safety and integrity of the dear toys, that it does not allow anyone to play them.

What to do how to deal with the greed of the child – practical advice for parents

How to treat children’s greed? What to do parents? Experts share their recommendations:

• The little child always notices all new, beautiful and «Brilliant» His peers and friends. And, of course, requires the same for itself. And to make sure the color, size, taste, etc. You should not immediately fly to the store and satisfy Caprice Krochi: In 5 years, the baby will require the same as a friend, a bicycle, at 8 years old – the same computer, at 18 – car. the effect «Snowball» Provided. Explain the child from the diaper – what can I buy, and what can not be why all wishes can not be executed, why harmful envy and greed. Learn your baby to take the world as it is, to appreciate someone else’s work.
• Softly and calmly explain to the crumb – why he is experiencing such feelings, why greed is bad, why it is important to share. Learn it to promptly recognize your emotions, share your negative from the positive and stop when bad feelings begin to prevail over good.
• The laying of moral values ​​lasts up to 4-5 years. In 10 years, it will be too late to deal with the Tyran inside the child, whom you created or did not see.
• Do not core and do not scold a little zada – Eliminate the reasons that lead to his greed. Do not go about your fear «oh that people think» – Think about the child, he will have to live with this greed in society.
• Do not overdo it and yourself clearly separate the greed of the child from his normal natural desire – to protect its territory, to defend their rights or their individuality.

• It is impossible to take a toy from his baby and give it to those whining karapuza from the sandbox against the will of his child. Child is equal to betrayal. Need to explain to the child – why it is important to share, and make sure that the baby himself wanted.
• Teach the child with your own example: Help those who need help, feed abandoned animals in nurseries, share with your baby to all – a piece of cake, thoughts, downtown worries and rest.
• Do not hang on the crumb label «Jaddah» and do not bend in the demonstration of your rejection of this feeling. «You are a trees, I’m not friends with you today» – This is the wrong approach and the usual parental manipulation by the child. The kid in such a situation is ready for anything, if only mom loved him again. As a result, educational goals are not reached (child «stops greed» from banal fear), and inside the baby grows insecure in himself.
• Any child needs motivation to understand anyone. Be prepared to always explain to the baby, what is good and what is bad exactly in such «Feed», that your child is interested in, understood and made conclusions.
• Do not get a child with those surrounding – «Everyone will think that you are Zhardde, Ay-Yai-Yai!». This is also the wrong approach. So you bring up a person who will depend on the opinions of foreign people. Why the child think what others think about him? The child should think about to remain honest, kind and responsive.
• Prepare a child before walking or campaigning that «There will be kids». Take with you toys that he does not feel sorry to share.
• Schedule a cross about the advantages and minuses: about the joy of sharing toys, about the fact that with a kind undellite person, everyone is happy to communicate with pleasure, and they don’t like to play with the chuds, and. Give examples from «Personal experience». The main thing is not «Pink» kid talk about hypothetical «Third Face», so that the child does not think that you are linous, but I realized that greed is bad.
• If the karapuz his toys hides behind the sinus, and the strangers take with pleasure, explain that such «exchange» Not honest.

• Give your child a clock and teach the time to understand the time segments. If the crumb is so afraid that the toy break or will not be returned, then determine the time during which «Masha will play a typewriter and give». Let the child himself decide – for 5 minutes or half an hour he changed toys.
• Praise the child for kindness. Let him remember that Mom rejoices when he shared with someone toys, or when he helps to other children and adults.
• Teach a child to respect and other people’s desires (that is, other private borders of personal space). If the friend of your baby does not want to share toys – this is his right, and this right must be respected.
• If the baby wants to walk his favorite car on the playground and absolutely not planning them to share them, then capture toys with you, about which your child will not worry about. Let him choose them.

remember, that Greed – normal phenomenon for kids. Over time, if you become a good teacher for crumbs, greed will pass. Be patient. Greater, the child will see and feel a positive return from good deeds, and the support and approval of mom and dad will further strengthen the understanding in it that it acts correctly.