Jealousy to the past of your partner – how to get rid of it?

How to forget past her husband or wife? Read on Lady-Magazine.COM tips how to get rid of jealousy to the past of your beloved person. Learn how to get rid of jealousy to the past and start a new life with your loved one

Not every woman can wisely treat the past of his partner – that is, to take his past as the past stage of life, and nothing more. Often it happens quite the opposite – the past of a loved one (especially, love in his past) becomes the cause of jealousy, suspicion and, in the end, the collapse of the love boat.

See also: How and why men are jealous?

How to learn how to live with the present and cope with «Green» feeling?

Jealousy to the former partner’s passion

Jealous All-consuming and fully blocking ability soberly think, covers with head, barely only information about «Former» accidentally pop up in a conversation with a partner.

Even abandoned casual phrase – «In this cafe I do not want, we have a dinner with chick there all the time» May be the beginning of a whole detective – with social networks for its communication with the former, watching his mail and communications, annoying thoughts about what happened he also hugged, loved, drove around restaurants and introduced his relatives.

Take the fact that Another woman once took the same place in his life, As you are now – almost impossible.

How to cope with such jealousy?

Remember:

• Your partner’s past has no No relation.
• Beginning «investigation», you Close to someone else’s personal zone and incite that fire conflict between you, which then you can not pay off.
• If you know about your aggravated feeling of jealousy (property), ignore all the details of the past His partner. «Excavations» in other people’s relationships will not add you confidence in relationships.
• Stop how to fight «chimerers». Live present.
• Admit yourself in your jealousy and learn to control it.
• If the partner stopped the choice on you, then, he is happy with you, And former love – just one of the inverted pages of his life.
• Jealousy is the signal that You do not trust your partner. If you are confident in it, there is no need to be afraid of the shadows of the past (and the present too). And if you do not trust, that is, you make sense to think about how strong your relationship? See also: How to find out that the relationship ended?

Jealousy to all women in the past partner

For some women, even the idea that The hands of the partner concerned someone else, Unbearable. And, it seems, a man is far from «botanist» 18 years old, and women’s attention to it – a completely normal phenomenon, a woman withdraws the fact that he could be loved by someone else.

How to deal with such a all-consuming feeling?

• If your partner is an adult attractive man, realize that in his life before your appearance were women. It would be strange if your partner was sitting all my life in the high tower and waited for your appearance. He is a man, and his bachelor life implies meetings, relations, partner search.
• Random (and even intentional) Mention of former women – Do not reason explode and look for a secret meaning in words and actions. Jealousy always makes a disorder in a relationship, and pathological jealousy – and the more.
• Fear that the partner’s communication with the past is too strong? Analyze the situation. Do you have real reasons for jealousy? If there is nothing except your fantasy – it is worth calming down and switch to strengthening your relationship (and not for destruction). If real «calls» from the past bring you out of equilibrium – it’s time to talk with your beloved. Otherwise, avalanche distrust and unresolved questions from the past one day will bury your relationship.
• Remember: You do not have the right to put on the guilt of his old novels. Yes, and you probably, too, there were meetings and relationships before.
• Your relationship is life with a clean slate, which automatically leaves the past where he and place. And sincere love does not know jealousy.

Jealousy to children partner

A fairly common type of jealousy, which, as a rule, has two «Persons».

• First: Jealousy to children. More precisely, anger from the fact that children «Perfect» then the attention that should be aimlessly belonging to you.
• Second: Jealousy to mother of his children. Every trip to the former wife in order to see children is perceived in the bayonets – «What if he still loves her?», «And if she tries to return it?», «And maybe children are just a pretext to see her?».

How to deal with such a two-headed «Zmeim»?

• First, understand that Husband and wife are forever connected by copper by children. Even if they broke up for a long time, they Both are responsible for the fate of their children and participate in their lives on equivalent rights (and responsibilities).
• Love for her children and love for a woman is Miscellaneous Nature Concept. The desire of men communicate with their children, despite the divorce with their mother, speaks of his decency, reliability and love for children. Would have a reason to think and alert if everything happened on the contrary. It is unlikely that a man who strikes children from his life after a divorce, worthy of respect. Bred with wives – not with children!
• It is useless to fight for the attention of men with his children. And even more so it is impossible to ban him to meet with them, or try to influence his attitude to them. Children are part of a man. Therefore, this rivalry is initially meaningless.

Jealousy to things (gifts) from past life

Gifts OT «Former», which are stored in a man – Frequent cause for conflicts in new relations. Tie, sweater, diary, postcards and especially photos – any thing from his past causes anger and jealousy. Main thought – «once keeps, it means expensive».

What to do with jealousy to past in this case?

• If the thing is to him «road» – This is completely does not mean that the partner still has feelings to the former beloved. It may be a tribute to the relationship, just unwillingness to get rid of gifts and.
• Your relationship – a new stage of his life. Relationship with the former – in the past. And no gifts (stored, wearable and pr.) can not change what you together. But your jealousy can.
• Never Do not require partner to get rid of gifts And do not think about doing this yourself. Quarrel (or even a break) will be provided.
• His things (no matter what stage of life) – This is his personal space. Your shared life does not give you the right to arrange a revision in his things.

Jealousy to the past lifestyle partner

When a beloved person unobtrusively talks about how great it was once to roll around the world, without worrying about anything, to get off in the middle of the week for fishing (hike, in the mountains) with friends, «spark off» in clubs and at all do not depend on anyone, the nervous system of the woman gives failure. On the one side – from jealousy to rich and happy past partner, with another – from the feeling of their uselessness – «Then he was happier than with me».

Fantasy makes his black case: a mentally devious picture of it from all sides of a pleasant past without you and not so good to the future with you Runs the mechanism of inadequate assessment of relationships.

How to change the situation?

• To begin with, it should be understood that Each person has an absolute freedom period in youth and the opportunity to take everything from life. Naturally, this stage leaves a lot of impressions and memories that sometimes want to get a memory with the Memolence and smile to their past recklessness. But this does not mean that a person lives in the past or hides in it from a dull present.
• If thoughts appear – «He is completely different with me, in the past he was happier» or «Since he returns to those memoirs, it means that he is better in them than with me», then It’s time to think – is everything good in «Danish kingdom». Most likely, his memories is only a reason to smile. But if they put in your reproach or have a different negative color – it’s time to talk. Or look at yourself from. You may need too much for your partner, limit it in all aspects of life or lead to a state of disintegration with your actions (or inaction). Consider: maybe your partner lacks something in your relationship? And it automatically compares your collaborative life with my past.
• Do not sculpt from the fly of an elephant. One of the female features – from nothing and at a flat place to create a salad, a new hairstyle and tragedy. As a rule, in the process of imaginable conversation with beloved it turns out that she is again «thickened paints», and he is more than happy in the relationship, and everything suits him.

Jealousy is a slow poison for a relationship. All that is good in them, dies suspicious, unnecessary questions and quarrels. And jealousy to the past is also an absurd reproach of his half for what you even had a relationship.

The only way to harmony in relationships – The elimination of jealousy in its reign. Take the Past partner as it is that it is, live in the present and build a relationship to confidence in each other.